some days.

I often say, “some days are not great.”  I’m not setting that up as if it were some original thought.  No. Indeed we’ve all had bad days – and have undoubtably thought the very same thing.  Maybe in that exact phrasing.

I am, by nature, an optimist.  I think God was gracious enough to design me that way, knowing it would come  in handy on the road I’ve traveled. Indeed – humor was the salve that soothed many of my scrapes and bruises.  But despite the optimism and mostly congenial personality, one fact remains – some days are not great.

Today was not great.

In realizing that, I took some time to examine how I might define or measure greatness as it relates to the overall success of my day.  What truly makes it great?  Did I win something?  “What do we have for her, Bob!?!?!”  Did I accomplish a long term goal?  Help a person out?  I further asked myself, “Am I measuring my day’s greatness based on some gooey feeling I am expecting to accompany a success – however that may translate?”

BINGO!

It occurred to me – I often measure “greatness” on how I feel, while failing to look at what good may have been birthed out of a seemingly NOT great situation.  Seemingly because maybe it was uncomfortable – or maybe even painful.  Does this sound lame and shallow of me?  Maybe.  I must be the only one struggling here.  It’s okay – I’ll own it.  But really – who goes through pain or discomfort and says, “hey that was grrrreat?”  You may not choose option B: masochists.  Let’s generalize here and apply that question to the collective majority.  w/e

Yea – today was not great.  Or was it?

I found myself in a rather difficult spot – faced to recognize that I was unprepared for the level of responsibility that was required of me to move into a role I’ve only dreamt about.   Shirking bureaucracy and corporate structures – I cringed at my reprimand.  “This is a bad day”, I thought to myself.  I demonstrated the outward appearance of humility – because afterall, that’s classy and we are all about appearances, right?

But not five minutes later I was forced to evaluate the same concern by a different individual.  My ears began to ring.  But not out of disdain.  My goodness, I am being given the opportunity to learn something here.  I paid careful attention and hung on to every single word of my superior.  There are those moments in life of the burning bush caliber – when you know for certain that God is speaking to you.  Today he was like, “Yo Moni B, listen up!  You got something to learn here.  GROW!”

It was the shaking I needed.  I get it.  And there is comfort in knowing that with a swift reprimand, if you choose to learn from it and grow, you are always pushed to new heights.

I am so grateful to be surrounded by people that I can learn from.  People who can mentor me.  How can I be better?  Well – today that question was answered.  And while under different circumstances and at a different point in my life I may have said, “today was not great”.  I am pleased that I have come to a place in my life when growing pains now translate to: today was great.

 

Well, most of the time.  Constantly growing.

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